Kit pulled hard on the oars to get the boat over the breakers and kept rowing so the land behind Juliet diminished.
‘What if a ferry comes?’ she said.
‘No one will see,’ said Kit, laying down the oars, kneeling forward to kiss her.
‘I should have brought a blanket…’
Over her shoulder, under the water, he saw something flicker.
‘…or cushions…’
He moved away from her and looked over the side.
‘The bottom’s dirty…’
Far below, a light twinkled. A candle? Ridiculous, he thought.
‘…and wet.’
He stood. And drawn to the light, he dived.
‘Kit?’ said Juliet into the empty evening. ‘Kit?’
*
For those who don’t know how Friday Fictioneers works, this picture (this time supplied by Doug MacIlroy) is our inspiration for our weekly online writing group hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. Each story is only about 100 words long, so why not read a few others: click here to read some more or to join in.
And please comment below with any suggestions on mine, or just to show you’ve visited.
Claire Fuller 
Doesn’t look good… doesn’t look good at all, was that a ferry coming from behind.. and Kit deserting her.. hmmm intriguing story…
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Thanks Bjorn.
Claire
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So much atmosphere here, I could really feel their tension. I lost it a bit at the candle, though – where does he think he’s going?
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I don’t know and neither did he! In the light of more comments saying what the hell is going on here, I’ve tried to make it a little clearer, even though there’s still no explanation for what he does.
Claire
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The lights of Atlantis? I bet it’s probably Rex playing silly buggers again. Good work!
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Yep, probably Rex playing at Sirens again…
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Interesting story.
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Thanks
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I’m not sure what’s going on here Claire. But it certainly got me thinking. 🙂
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In the light of your and other comments, I’ve tried to make his actions a little clearer, if not why he does it. I don’t know why there is a candle under the sea. Perhaps I’ve just written a bit of magic realism, I really don’t know!
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I guess I’m with everyone else. What’s happening here?
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I’ve tried to make his actions and what he sees a little clearer. But I don’t know why he dives in, and what he’s seen. I quite like stories without answers, but I’m not sure they’re for everyone!
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Such a clever way of drawing the reader in, fab 🙂
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Thanks Helen. Glad you enjoyed it.
Claire
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Wow, I like how Bjorn guessed some sort of plot behind Kit’s actions. Oddly enough, I wasn’t left wondering why Kit dove in. I’m left wondering what’s he going to find?! I found this very intriguing, and I love the open ending!
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Thanks. I don’t know what he’s going to find either.
Claire
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I assume it was an underwater world, if not Atlantis, certainly similar.
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Perhaps, or something else entirely that none of us have ever thought of!
Claire
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Dear Claire,
I love this story for the mystery. It is the perfect metaphor for the attraction of the sea (and the lure of women). Men are easily distracted by bright shiny things and something below knows this and has had its dinner….or Kit is now through the wormhole and off on an adventure in another world. I once saw a short black and white film about a boy who swam to the bottom of his pool and into the drain. He surfaced in a clear, slow river, tree shaded river and met a young girl…. For a while he could move between the two worlds but eventually had to make a choice. (I must find that if I can…Isn’t that why Google was invented?)
I don’t think you need worry about answering everyone’s questions or supplying too much clarity. One of the joys of reading is the worlds we build in our minds to explain the mystery. Good job.
Aloha,
Doug
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Thanks Doug. Let me know if you think of that film – sounds intriguing.
Claire
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I’m of the same mind as Doug. Couldn’t have said it better myself! Loved your take!
Greetings from Greece!
Maria (MM Jaye)
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Ooh, I wonder what he finds. I’m on the ‘intrigued’ side, Claire. He’s obviously mesmerised because he’s ignoring his love completely.
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And she was a bit annoying anyway!
Thanks,
Claire
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Claire, Good story. I think I’d be more than a little upset if someone left me alone in a boat out on the water. I’d give him a reasonable time to resurface then start rowing back. Well written. 🙂 —Susan
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Yes, definitely, let’s leave him there.
Claire
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Sounds like the death lights to me, calling him into a watery grave. A chilling idea. I enjoyed it!
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Full of mystery. Siren lights!
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This is like a strange Shirley Jackson story where odd things happen without explanation. Quite enjoyed this.
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I think he’s probably better off with whoever or whatever is under the sea – that girl seems a bit picky!
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your stories are always intriguing. They are very much like a mystery box.
Enjoyed the story and the world in which it left me.
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I got the feeling it was a submarine on a spy mission, a la James Bond. Well, any way one looks at it or reads into it, you did a super job, Claire!
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Dear Claire, Good story and scary. I wonder what it was – well it’s not important enough to dive into the unknown. She should have waited for the ferry. Thanks, Nan
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Kit’s wandered off to Atlantis or some other exciting place. Tantalizing end, makes you think of the different directions this could take.
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Claire,
Beautiful and chilling.
Marie Gail
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