Simon was whistling a tune, an old song I couldn’t place. I heard Cara huff. We’d taken a picnic up to the roof – cold salmon, cheese and bread, olives, too much wine – and we lay on the rug amongst the empty bottles and chimney stacks. When I opened my eyes an aeroplane trail had cut the blue sky in two.
‘What is that song?’ I said, turning onto my side.
Simon’s lips were stained red.
Cara staggered angrily to her feet. ‘Simon thinks I’m going to leave him,’ she said to me.
‘Well, you are, aren’t you?’ Simon said.
She swayed; whispered. ‘You’d never let me.’
***
This is a 100-word (or so) flash fiction piece inspired by the picture above. You do need to know that old Peter, Paul and Mary song to know what’s going on. This week the picture was provided by Melanie Greenwood, and the whole Friday Fictioneers thing is hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. Join in. Read others.
***
The paperback of my novel, Our Endless Numbered Days, has just been published in the UK, and I’m delighted that it’s been chosen as a Richard & Judy Book Club book (the closest we have to Oprah), and also the Waterstones Book Club. Read more here.
Dear Claire,
I’m a Peter, Paul and Mary fan from way back. Now I’ll be humming it for a while. 😉
I’m a bit confused here. Is Cara referring to Peter in “He thinks I’m going to leave him.” or is this her husband and Peter has no intention of making a commitment?
Well written as always, nonetheless. Congratulations on the book club.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Ahh- you’re so right. I have some backstory in my head which isn’t in this, so that doesn’t make sense. I’ve edited! Thanks so much for the spot.
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Much better. Happy to return the favor. 😉
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This is why FF is sooo good.
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Nicely done. I think I wrote one last year that was a conversation between Jimi Hendrix and his British girlfriend. Nobody got that one either. I think we’re showing our age!
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Definitely showing our age. Except my Peter wasn’t meant to be the Peter in P,P &M. Embarrassingly I didn’t even notice that they had the same name. Just changed my Peter to Simon!
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Jimi Hendrix? Wasn’t he in Nirvana?
Sadly, I actually had a young man ask me that once. I nearly broke a tooth from clenching my teeth so hard. 🙂
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Oh dear. Youth…
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Odd how the photo of a private jet plane totally changed the meaning of the song for me. Always imagined an airline plane before.
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I’d always imagined a commercial plane in the song too. It does kind of change the meaning if it becomes a private jet – I agree.
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I opened your story and got distracted, came back, read about Peter, refreshed the page, wondered what happened to Peter and now listening to Peter, Paul and Mary. Oh Claire, you offered so much entertainment today! Loved the story and loved the music. You painted such a vivid picture.
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The comments here are just as good as the story! 🙂
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Ah! I didn’t read the title, and still got it. I’d have been tempted to make people work for it. Good one, and the picnic sounds terrific.
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That last line packs a real punch. I like it.
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Read the title and started humming the song, though have to say I couldn’t remember who sang it – a senior moment! I enjoyed the story and was there up on the roof (another song?) Great take on the prompt.
PS I took a photo of your book in our local Waterstones was going to add it here but don’t seem able to do that. Thoroughly enjoyed reading your book, great imagery and imagination, loved it.
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Thanks Dee. So glad you enjoyed the story and the book!
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Wow! Love that last line – leaves sooo much to wonder about. Well done, Claire!
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Thanks. I think it might be from book number 3. Still working it out.
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Strong, simple story. This song is part of my life, so I had to go listen again.
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It is pure nostalgia. And lovely.
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C – I have to say that I needed the comment to figure out the song… but I do like how you can draw so many possibilities into the brief story. The last sentence really added another layer that leave me almost disturbed.
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I was hoping that would happen Bjorn. It’s difficult when you write a story with a reference that you know not everyone will get. Have to hope the majority will, I suppose…
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I didn’t have a clue what was going on but I still enjoyed the feel of it 🙂
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Oh dear – that’s not so good. Too cryptic perhaps
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Luckily I’m old enough to get the reference. That last line is a stunner. Leaves the reader wondering what’s going on between the lines. Well done.
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Thanks Alicia. There’s definitely something not quite right between Simon and Cara
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Yes, I didn’t quite “get it” either but enjoyed it nonetheless. I just imagined what I wanted. 🙂
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Thanks Dawn. I think it’s because there’s so much backstory in my head, which I didn’t get down. Will try to be clearer next week 🙂
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I don’t get the reference to the song – but the story stands alone well by itself.
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Thanks, glad you liked it.
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I have to agree… the comments are almost as good as the story. I fear I now have the song stuck in my head.
That last line changes everything!
By the way… you are my January read for my Year in Books. On chapter two and enjoying it so far!
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Comments with Friday Fictioneers are such fun! So pleased you’re enjoying OEND so far.
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Love that song! Now it’s stuck in my head, which is a happy coincidence. I loved the story. Although, I did struggle a bit to understand the ending. Still, lovely images and sounds. 🙂
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Thanks! I guess I should explain it a bit. Three people on a picnic. Simon hums the song. There is obviously tension between him and Cara. He’s winding her up by singing it, and finally she explains to the narrator that Simon is singing it because he thinks Cara is going to leave him. He agrees. Then Cara admits that Simon wouldn’t let her leave. (I was meaning to suggest that he has some control over her – physical or mental I’m not sure.)
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Congratulations on your books placement. I have to be honest I love the song, but did not get the story on the first read. Going through the the comments helped.
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Thanks Yolanda. Sorry for being a big obscure this week!
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Without the link to the song, I fear I would have been completely lost here. With that context, the story is somewhat more complete. Stylistically, I wouldn’t change a thing, but it seems as though there is much more to this story than can be managed in 100 words. You told this portion well, so I’m aching to read the rest.
All my best,
MG
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Yes – I think you’re right MG. Too ambitious for 100 words.
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Like quite a few others, I was at a loss here, sorry.
But I did like the ominous last line.
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Huge fan of PP&M and love where you took that song with this photo. Nice job!
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I realy like the atmosphere you set here, with the red stained lips, the roof, the plane’s exhaust cutting the sky… The meaning is open to several interpretations, which isn’t a bad thing. I think it’s clear that Simon wants to control Cara, and that she lets him. But with the PP&M song, it would be more a leaving to do her own thing, not the end of a love. But apparently, as I understand it, he can’t tolerate it.
And congrats on the book. I read it, too, and found it beautifully written and very thought-provoking.
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I’m not familiar with the song or the back story, but I just love your writing style so much I don’t even care. 🙂
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Oh, what a nice thing to say. Thank you
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Simple, brilliant – and yes, I too remember that song.
Visit Keith’s Ramblings!
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Thanks, Keith. Glad you liked it.
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I’m in the mood now to just hang around, have a picnic and listen to music. See what you just did? Nice one, Claire.
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Hah – that’s a good thing. Thanks, Amy
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Leaving on a jet plane….
DJ
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First of all, Congratulations on the continued success of your book. Next, good story based on a song I liked so much. Well written as always. It would be uncomfortable to be in the middle of that personal confrontation. — Suzanne
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Thanks for the congratulations, and glad you liked the story
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okay okay….that song is now going round and round in my head! Love that you initially (before I read it) used Peter as the name……shifting it to Simon now makes me think of Paul Simon as in Simon and Garfunkel…..another powerhouse of my generation. Maybe there was a bridge over troubled waters with these two also? 🙂 Really enjoyed this!
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So glad you enjoyed it and sorry about the ear worm. Love Paul Simon.
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C…I like the uncertainty in this story. What is left unsaid is more powerful than what is on the page. Are they married? Lovers? Married to others? The possibilities and consequences are huge.
Ω
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Ah, that’s lovely to hear. I was hoping for someone who read it just like you have
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Simon sounds like he needs to be left. I hope Cara finds the confidence to do it. And soon. Great atmosphere and mood in your story – the plane slicing the sky, the drunkenness, Simon’s red lips, the interesting role of the narrator as a third party and observer of the tension. Great.
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Thanks, Margaret. Those were all the things I was trying to achieve.
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