Flash Fiction: Light

hokusai4rwf

Kit pulled hard on the oars to get the boat over the breakers and kept rowing so the land behind Juliet diminished.
‘What if a ferry comes?’ she said.
‘No one will see,’ said Kit, laying down the oars, kneeling forward to kiss her.
‘I should have brought a blanket…’
Over her shoulder, under the water, he saw something flicker.
‘…or cushions…’
He moved away from her and looked over the side.
‘The bottom’s dirty…’
Far below, a light twinkled. A candle? Ridiculous, he thought.
‘…and wet.’
He stood. And drawn to the light, he dived.
‘Kit?’ said Juliet into the empty evening. ‘Kit?’

*

For those who don’t know how Friday Fictioneers works, this picture (this time supplied by Doug MacIlroy) is our inspiration for our weekly online writing group hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. Each story is only about 100 words long, so why not read a few others: click here to read some more or to join in.

And please comment below with any suggestions on mine, or just to show you’ve visited.

34 thoughts on “Flash Fiction: Light

    • I don’t know and neither did he! In the light of more comments saying what the hell is going on here, I’ve tried to make it a little clearer, even though there’s still no explanation for what he does.
      Claire

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    • In the light of your and other comments, I’ve tried to make his actions a little clearer, if not why he does it. I don’t know why there is a candle under the sea. Perhaps I’ve just written a bit of magic realism, I really don’t know!

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    • I’ve tried to make his actions and what he sees a little clearer. But I don’t know why he dives in, and what he’s seen. I quite like stories without answers, but I’m not sure they’re for everyone!

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  1. Wow, I like how Bjorn guessed some sort of plot behind Kit’s actions. Oddly enough, I wasn’t left wondering why Kit dove in. I’m left wondering what’s he going to find?! I found this very intriguing, and I love the open ending!

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  2. Dear Claire,

    I love this story for the mystery. It is the perfect metaphor for the attraction of the sea (and the lure of women). Men are easily distracted by bright shiny things and something below knows this and has had its dinner….or Kit is now through the wormhole and off on an adventure in another world. I once saw a short black and white film about a boy who swam to the bottom of his pool and into the drain. He surfaced in a clear, slow river, tree shaded river and met a young girl…. For a while he could move between the two worlds but eventually had to make a choice. (I must find that if I can…Isn’t that why Google was invented?)

    I don’t think you need worry about answering everyone’s questions or supplying too much clarity. One of the joys of reading is the worlds we build in our minds to explain the mystery. Good job.

    Aloha,

    Doug

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Claire, Good story. I think I’d be more than a little upset if someone left me alone in a boat out on the water. I’d give him a reasonable time to resurface then start rowing back. Well written. 🙂 —Susan

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  4. your stories are always intriguing. They are very much like a mystery box.
    Enjoyed the story and the world in which it left me.

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