Every morning for a month Nanette and I trudged behind our father down to the boat. We each carried an oar, and he carried the cockerel. Everyone stared as he tied the flapping bird to the transom, and rowed out to sea. He didn’t care.
‘What’s he doing?’ someone asked.
‘Looking for our mother,’ Nanette said. I turned away, too wretched to hear her explanation: that Norwegians believe the cockerel will crow when the boat moves over the drowned.
The following day the cockerel got loose and my father sat on the sand and cried, and I turned away once more.
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A Friday Fictioneers 100-word (or so) story inspired by the picture supplied by Georgia Koch. Friday Fictioneers is organised and run by the wonderful Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. Click here to join in, and here to read other pieces.
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If any Canadian readers are interested in winning a copy of my novel, Our Endless Numbered Days, Goodreads is hosting a giveaway for people who live in Canada. (Apologies again to all the Friday Fictioneers from the States!)
Blisteringly sad. I’ve gone all goose-pimply. One tiny quibble. Should the narrator say ‘our father’ in the first sentence? The ‘my’ distances him/ her from Nanette, who uses ‘our mother’. But maybe distance and separation from sibling/ everyone is what you were trying to achieve.
You’re absolutely right. The ‘my’ was left over from the first draft when there wasn’t even a sister. Thanks for spotting, and for reading.
Claire
Very poignant. Stark and sad.
Thanks Kate.
The Norwegians have some fascinating legends, and your story illustrates this one so well.
Yes, I think this is a true piece of Norwegian folk-lore. Thanks for reading. Claire
Really moving tale Claire.
Thanks, glad you liked it.
Claire
You can pack the feeling of loss into the action.. and somehow the escaping cockerel made it even sadder.. (and now draws for Sweden I guess… so I guess I might order the book instead).
Thanks Bjorn. No, the book hasn’t sold in Sweden 🙁
Claire
my father sat on the sand and cried This makes such a vivid picture after all the trips to sea. Movement full of hope versus the anchoring of loss. Well done
Thanks! Glad you liked it
Claire
Dear Claire,
Beautiful and achingly sad. I do love your writing.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thanks Rochelle.
Claire
Oh! This wrenched my heart. Beautifully done.
I’m glad it affected you! Thanks for reading.
Claire
yes very beautifully bitter tale. i got a little misty eyed at the daughter feeling the pain of losing her mother to the sea and then losing her father to his grief. lovely tale.
Thanks. I did go a bit grim this week.
Claire
It is true that we will do anything – anything – to avoid facing the unfaceable. This is what I got most from your story. Lovely writing.
That’s a good way of putting it. Thanks for reading.
Claire
Dear Claire,
The spell you cast with your word choice and arrangement is what I most enjoyed about this story. The forlorn father lamenting lost wife and vanished cockerel, the daughter twice turing away. Absolutely beautiful. You take us into the hearts of your characters, Claire. It is part of your magic.
Aloha,
Doug
Ahh, thanks Doug.
Deeply moving, Claire. The cockerel escaping and drowning too, just brought this story full circle. The grief is palpable.
Thanks, I’m glad you liked it.
Claire
This was exquisitely done. That sense of grief and loss captured so movingly and the lovely touch of the Norwegian belief to convey how desperation makes us do strange things.
Yes, I think he must have been desperate, and the children bewildered.
Thanks for reading and commenting.
Claire
i find the last sentence very moving. well done.
Thank you!
Heart-wrenching in 100 words! Wow!
Ahh, thanks Dawn!
So sad. Your story has an exotic feel to it, with the cockerel story, but the feelings of grief and loss are universal. Beautiful.
I’m surprised that cockerels seem exotic, but perhaps that’s just to do with where we’re both located? Thanks for reading, and I’m glad you liked it.
Claire
Dear Claire, Your writing is so moving – always – even if it’s a happy story or a sad one. Good job! Nan 🙂
Thanks Nan. Glad you liked it. I don’t seem to write ‘happy’ ones very often!
Claire
I love the understated way that you capture sadness, loss and in a sense, bitterness. This story is a perfect example of your art. Well done.
Thanks Sandra!
Claire
I love your use of language. I had never heard of this strange custom and yet you made it seem the most natural thing in the world to go in search of the dead with a cockerel..
Superb.
Dee
Thanks Dee. I think it is a true custom, although I doubt anyone practices it anymore!
Dear Claire,
For me, the story this week is in the turning, but there is much in your 100 words. Well told.
All my best,
Marie Gail
Thanks Marie Gail. Glad you enjoyed it.
Claire
Interesting bit of foldlore, Claire. Very sad, but well written as always. — Suzanne
Not sure why I always write sad. Perhaps this week I’ll try for happy…or perhaps not.
Claire
Beautifully sad. You capture the emotions perfectly. 🙂