My mother fed the squirrels left-overs: scraps of bacon rind, apple peelings, and the skins of grilled tomatoes that my father left on his plate. The squirrels would only go to her – sitting in the palm of her hand to eat. She named them, worried about them, loved them, more than her own child.
–
The investigating officer thought the fire had started in the attic. ‘The electrical cables were probably gnawed through,’ he said, putting his hand over mine.
‘Squirrels?’ I asked.
‘I’m afraid so.’
As he completed his report I bit my cheek hard and right on cue, the tears flowed.
***
A Friday Fictioneers 100-word (or so) story inspired by the picture supplied by Ted Strutz. Friday Fictioneers is organised and run by the wonderful Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. Click here to join in, and here to read other pieces. I’d love to know what you think of mine – please leave a comment!
***
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This one touched me. Poignant.
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Thank you. But did you work out who really set the fire? I’m a bit worried I might have been too subtle!
Claire
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Think we all know who set the fire….give us an R….give us an E….etc
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I shall pretend that her only problem was an inability to express emotion over her mother’s death; but I just know that her problems are far greater than that. 🙂 Nice one.
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You can stick your head in the sand, but it never was the squirrels…
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But was it the squirrels or were they being fitted up…?
Ah.
Great flash. I really enjoyed this. And it only slightly had something to do with my squirrel obsession.
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You can sleep easily tonight – it wasn’t the squirrels!
Thanks for reading.
Claire
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Indeed.. very touching.. In some sense a betrayal that you can’t do anything against.. This story lingers in my mind.
Björn
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Thanks Bjorn. But you do realise… it wasn’t the squirrels??
Claire
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Ah.. I feel icicles on my spine..
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Captures such depth…. Fab!
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Thanks Poppy
Claire
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That had me going for a moment. And she’s going to get away with it!
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Yes, I do believe she is.
Claire
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That was dark. On first reading, a touching piece, until you catch the detail about her biting her cheek. Well-crafted.
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Thanks Helena.
Claire
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And to the investigator it would simply look like she’s gritting her teeth while crying. Clever, and a little horrifying.
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She’s not a nice character. Thanks for reading and commenting.
Claire
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Dear Claire,
I do love a final line that changes the entire tone of a story. Nicely handled.
All my best,
Marie Gail
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Thank you!
Claire
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Devious! 😀
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Great story! This is why parents should hug their children, otherwise, they’ll blame their murder on the squirrels…
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Ah yes, good point. Going to hug mine now…
Claire
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Sharp, tight, moving. Thanks.
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Thanks Hilary.
Claire
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A case of Matricide I do believe. Personally, I still blame the squirrels.
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Matricide – that’s a good word. You’re always blaming someone else. When are you just going to own up??
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So many layers here. I read the comments but still like to two interpretations of the ‘whodunit.’ Either way you go, that’s what you get for wasting bacon rinds.
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Hah! Good point. I always eat my bacon rinds. I should be alright.
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Killer ending 😉
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Thanks Helen!
Claire
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I realized it wasn’t the squirrels right away. Well done.
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Ah, an astute reader. I like those. Thanks for reading.
Claire
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Those darn squirrels…In her mind, it is their fault. I always like multilayered stories and this one is excellent.
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Thanks, glad you enjoyed it.
Claire
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Oooh, chills of the best sort. You were very subtle, allowing me to feel smug that I “caught on” before reading the comments. (We have squirrels in our attic at work…hmmmm.) Well done!
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Ooh, be careful of those squirrels! Thanks for reading and commenting.
Claire
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Oooo,,,so very sinister!
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She’s not a nice person is she? Thanks for reading, Dawn.
Claire
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Well, well, well… Sneaky little child.
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Yes, lots going on beneath her surface.
Claire
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I love this story and knew right away – it was the daughter. When she had to bite her jaw so she could cry on cue. Sneaky girl who will probably get away with it and grow up to greater and bigger murders. Good job! Nan 🙂
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I think you might be right. Thanks Nan.
Claire
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So sad and eerie at the same time. Excellent read. 🙂
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Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it.
Claire
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That’s beautiful Claire. Sounds like the squirrels will get successfully framed for this one. You pulled everything together like a pro in that last line.
-David
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Ah, thanks David.
Claire
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Dear Claire,
You are the sly one. This is a beautifully subtle story…”loved them more than her own child,” as told by that child. The whole thing made me shiver.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Glad you spotted that Rochelle. And pleased you liked it.
Thanks, Claire
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Dear Claire,
I hate you, I love you, I hate you, I love you…. You are such a fine writer. (And not at all too subtle. Everything was perfect in its place.) Going to go gnaw on some wires in your attic now.
Aloha,
Doug
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Hah! Don’t hate me. You’re a damn fine writer yourself.
Claire
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Very sad. Not only that everything burnt down, but that she was only able to fully love the squirrels.
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Yep – hard on her child, who paid her back…
Thanks for reading and commenting.
Claire
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Not at all too subtle. First time I read this lovely mystery, “… even her own child …” didn’t register, so I got to the end and knew that the child had caused the fire. I wondered if it had been an accident and she wanted to cover her guilt by letting the squirrels be blamed. Then I re-read the story to see how you’d written about her father, then her mother. The skinning of the tomatoes raised an eyebrow for a moment. For me, you could have left out the ‘even her own child, bit’. I do like those skinned tomatoes, even if they mean ‘nothing’. I look forward even more to your book! 🙂
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Thanks! I’m not sure why the tomato skins went in there – a bit of character development perhaps.
Claire
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Skinned tomatoes. As a metaphor, it could be disturbing.Unique.
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There’s so much going on here. The father leaving food on his plate, the mother and her pet project, the child and feelings of abandonment…the fire. I love it that my imagination can go in so many directions with this one.
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Thanks Melanie. That’s exactly what I was hoping to achieve.
Claire
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I loved this one, starts as such a nice observational piece and then you slipped in “loved them, more than her own child”. And bang the last line that turned it all around. Ooh! Evil murdering child.
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Thank you! Glad you picked up all the little clues.
Claire
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Loved it – I didn’t get it the first time round, but the biting the inside of the mouth, loved the squirrels more… Excellent.
Cheers
KT
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Hopefully you got it the second time. Glad you enjoyed it.
Claire
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The pain of her mother’s lack of love is so tangible that I’m not sad her revenge will go unpunished. Obviously, I can’t say I’m pleased she got away with it 🙂
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Yes, I kind of feel sorry for her, although her reaction was a bit extreme.
Claire
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Those poor squirrels are being stitched up! This is a sad but also slightly creepy piece. Well done. 🙂
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Thanks! Glad you liked it.
Claire
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Such a sad little tale of an unloved child. How she must have hated those squirrels. The feigned tears were an effective image. Beautifully written.
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Yes… and her mother! Thanks for reading and commenting.
Claire
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I wonder who’ll feed the squirrels now. Well told – a sad and engaging story.
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I reckon they’ll find someone else. Thanks!
Claire
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Nice stitch-up. She seems to have committed the perfect crime.
I love the writing – so evocative and clever!
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Thanks Sonya. Really pleased you liked it.
Claire
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Pingback: In the Media: 25th January & 1st February 2015 | The Writes of Woman
So many unloving parents! Why do they have children? It does make for good story telling. 🙂
Lily
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I guess us writers just go for the most drama. Loving parents don’t give it.
Thanks for reading.
Claire
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Masterful. i love the way you set this up and told us so much about this family at the same time.
Well done.
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Great story. And relieved that my assuming the squirrels were framed doesn’t mark me down as some sort of psychopath.
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I have to admit, Claire, that I didn’t get it wasn’t the squirrels until I read the comments. Maybe that was because we once had a raccoon in our attic. That child better get help before she harms someone else she’s angry with. Well done as always. — Suzanne
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