
I stand under their bedroom window at night and hear them talking:
‘I don’t think she’s ever had a boyfriend,’ she says.
‘No?’ he says.
‘Still a virgin; at her age. Can you imagine?’
‘Not like you then, is she?’ he says, and she shrieks and laughs as if he’s goosed her. They are both silent for a minute or two, and I try not to imagine.
‘Do you think she misses it?’ she says.
‘You can’t miss what you’ve never known,’ he says.
‘But having someone?’
‘No,’ he says. ‘Not her.’
And I turn away, both stronger and sadder.
Listen to me reading it:
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This is a Friday Fictioneers story, hosted by the lovely Rochelle, and inspired by the photo above. This week provided by Janet Webb. Click here to join in and read more.
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A few weeks ago my short story, A Quiet Tidy Man won the Royal Academy & Pin Drop short story award. At the award ceremony the winner was announced by actress, Juliet Stevenson. The recording of the event and her reading my story aloud is now available to listen to. Visit this page, and click through to listen.
An anatomically precise disection, Claire.Raw and glistening
Thanks Neil.
And congratulations on the prize
Stronger and sadder. That’s an acute observation of the way you’d feel after listening to that conversation. And congratulations on your success. So very well deserved.
Thanks so much Sandra.
Intriguing piece, Claire, as expertly crafted as ever.
But who are they, and why is she listening under their bedroom window?
All a bit creepy.
I meant to say last week, I enjoyed your reading, although I was surprised at how jolly English you sound!
Yes, a bit creepy. And glad you liked the recording. I’m always surprised at how beautifully Scottish you sound!
I’ll have to read one on my stories. Perhaps I sound even more beautifully Scottish…lol.
Hah! Yes, do it!
You probably wouldn’t understand me. Think of a mix between Beggie from Trainspotting and Neil Oliver. As an aside, how do you do it?
Begbie!
I use my iphone and the voice notes facility, and then email myself the file, and upload it. I’m not sure how I would do it without an iphone or equivalent…
Hmmn, ok. I might give it a go. Would be quite fun if one week in the future all entries had to be spoken i.e. no written words.
Congratulations on the award. Nice story, too. I saw your book here in Iowa on the shelf of Prairie Lights. It made me smile.
Thanks! Lovely to know my book is making its way to all corners of the world!
Dear Claire,
Powerful story in a few words. Full of emotion. I enjoyed hearing your read.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thanks so much Rochelle.
You’ve done this so well. But then again, you do this so well. Congrast on another success.
Thanks! Glad you liked it.
This is great, and so sad. Good for her that she’ll be stronger through it, comments like that can easily wear a person out. Congrats on your success. 🙂
Thanks. I wasn’t sure how to end it: stronger or sadder. So went for both!
As a reader I feel for your listener, but then I wonder why she listens,
Yes, pointless to listen. Perhaps they weren’t even talking about her…
Very powerful story and so nice to hear you read it. I was pleased to recommend your book to my Book Club and we all had fun discussing it a few weeks ago. It was well liked but that didn’t surprise me. No, not at all! Congrats on the prize.
Ahh, that’s so kind of you, thank you! You should have said and I could have sent you some book club questions – but it sounds like you got along fine without them anyway.
We had a great evening and our host had a list of ten questions. Now I’m curious where she got them!
I suppose she might have emailed me for them. Lots of people do, and most I don’t recognise the name of.
Possible but I’m going to find out 🙂
Delightful to hear you read your story. How sad she must feel.
Thanks Alicia
Another excellent piece Claire, well done. 🙂
Thank you
Despite her sadness her determination shines through here. Congratulations on the prize.
Thanks!
That was painful. I felt so sorry for her.
Thanks Dawn. The reaction every writers wants!
Great story, Claire – we both had our trolleys gossiping! And huge congratulations on your win – what a thrill!
Thanks Liz. That’s what the picture looked like, didn’t it?
That’s why its not good to eavesdrop!
Poignant!
Exactly!
Oh, has quite a heavy impact but the phrase: ‘as if he’s goosed her … I try not to imagine’ provides the perfect counterbalance so therefore profound but not overtly maudling… using both stronger & sadder offer much widercscope too. Nice job!
Thanks Poppy. I’m flattered that you’ve read it in such detail!
It’s a pleasure… gaining so much from these flash fiction pieces for my own writing😊
Powerful story. I just wanted to keep reading.
Thank you!
Both reading and writing superb! Claire, you’re doing great! That ending is what sealed the deal for me. Bravissimo!
Thank you!
I like how you’ve used the viewpoint of an eavesdropper – most unusual. And as you say above, perhaps the conversation wasn’t even about her – but it obviously applies to her. Ending it as you do gives depth to the character, and gives much food for thought. Terrific. Congratulations on your short story success, too.
Thanks so much Margaret. Really pleased you liked it.
And here we are as readers listening in too. Nicely done and congratulations on the prize.
Oh yes. Good point!
Good story and writing as always, Claire. Congratulations on the award and having your story read by an actress. I recognize her from TV. How exciting. It’s too bad it fell on the night it did, but that didn’t take away from the award. I’m getting to this comment late in the evening here, so will listen to the reading earlier tomorrow. Well done. 🙂 — Suzanne
Thanks so much Suzanne
Congratulations on your other story! I will check it out. I enjoyed this one and its play with perspective and self knowledge.
Thanks Emily